OPINION – FRANK TALK: On technological advances – News – Wicked Local Kingston

As another birthday approaches like a hungry lion approaches an antelope lost in thought, I reflect that I really haven’t accomplished all that much.

Courier & Sentinel Editor Frank Mulligan can be reached at fmulligan@wickedlocal.com

As another birthday approaches like a hungry lion approaches an antelope lost in thought, I reflect that I really haven’t accomplished all that much.

But, ah, the technological advancements I’ve seen in my many decades-long sojourn on terra firma.

Why, I can remember seeing color TV for the first time. It was a Mets game. I was struck by all that green grass.

It was right about the same time the TV “network” was promoting this revolutionary new situation comedy dealing with your typical family. Many families back then featured newlywed parents, six kids, a housekeeper and two missing biological parents whose fate no one liked to dwell on.

TV’s explosion wasn’t limited to color and groundbreaking drama either.

For you young folks, I can recall when there were only three TV stations, and they didn’t run around the clock.

That’s right.

They would go off the air.

If you were lucky, they’d leave you with a snazzy test pattern and an interminable electronic whining sound to lull you to sleep.

Today, there are several zillion things we can view on screens at every single second of the day.

It’s been a tremendous advancement.

There have been many such tremendous advances over time.

They’ve come most noticeably in the realm of computers, of course.

In my youth, the computer that guided the Apollo space project was streamlined from a unit seven refrigerators wide to a svelte 70 pounds. Now, a unit with commensurate memory can fit in a hot dog bun – even one loaded with chili and onions.

Fast food has also evolved, much like a small rodent-esque creature evolved into the Blue Whale

Now every single man, woman and child has the opportunity to eat each and every meal, from breakfast to dinner, from brunch to a midnight snack within moments of ordering.

What can top such an advance?

Well, many things.

For instance, eight-track tapes were once considered capable of providing music.

They really weren’t. Today, music can be provided with studio-like quality through a variety of media, and the songs don’t get cut in the middle with a loud click. It’s a mind-boggling technological advance.

GPS systems have represented a tremendous advance, as well.

In the old days, you’d stop at a gas station and ask directions.

And while this was a great way to meet new people it also revealed how often people working in gas stations commuted to work from other communities.

You’d often hear the refrain, “Gee, I don’t know. I’m not from around here.”

The phenomenon probably should have been subjected to sociological study.

But the greatest technological advances (outside of medicine, communications, transportation, and agriculture to name several) undoubtedly came in the realm of frozen dinners.

That’s right, kids.

You would truly appreciate that Trader Joe’s Chicken Tikka Masala, Mushroom Ravioli, or Stouffer’s Lasagna with Meat and Sauce if you had faced the ordeal of the old-time frozen dinner.

The aluminum serving tray (nothing says fine dining like aluminum) was divided into compartments.

Let’s say you were being served the Salisbury Steak Dinner. On the package, the meat was tucked into the largest compartment in brown gravy, and the peas, mashed potatoes and peach cobbler were all neatly tucked into their smaller aluminum cubbyholes. They all fit nicely and looked like, well, peas, mashed potatoes, and peach cobbler.

In practice, though, the foodstuffs tended to migrate. The results were peas in mashed potatoes and the more egregious gravy in your peach cobbler.

With the immutability of gravity, these meals never cooked evenly. Your Salisbury steak was always burned yet still frozen, which in itself is something of a marvel.

Count your blessings kids.

We’ve come a long way.